This week I had to say good bye to an aunt. Like all funerals, it forced an overwhelming amount of emotion that is hard to make sense of in the moment. I didn't know my aunt very well. Truthfully, I hadn't seen her in over 10 years. So as my eyes kept filling with tears, I kept asking myself why am I so upset about this? I was even afraid to show emotion at the funeral in fear of people thinking I didn't have a right, especially since I didn't know her the way they did. As I sat there watching everyone who's life she was part of, weep and reflect on her life, it made me think. Why do we wait until something dies to remember how beautiful it was?
Why does the talk of death always seem to make people uncomfortable? Why is it so taboo? I believe if everyone was to think about death on a daily basis, people would start seeing and living their lives so differently. I want this post to push that uncomfortable cloud surrounding death aside and to shine some much needed light on the topic. People die everyday it is a reality. But let me ask you this, if you were to walk into your doctor's office today and they told you, you had 1 year to live how much differently would you live that year? Would you stay mad at that loved one? Would you still be working where you are? Would all the little things you think matter right now, still matter? I think the question everyone needs to ask themselves is, why does it take someone telling you that your going to die to start living, when you already know for certain that you have limited years in this world? Live as if you were dying, because in reality we all are.
Why are we so afraid of death? I believe it's because it forces a reflection on one's life. It is an awakening of your perspective on life, and it brings an awareness of how you've been living your own. It is a big slap in the face to wake up and reflect. It forces us to ask the question, what is our purpose? We need to stop just existing and start being aware of our existence. Everyone needs to take a breath of fresh air and start, truly, living everyday on purpose. No one really knows when this life will come to an end. All we know is there is an end to our physical form as we speak. Life is soooooo precious. We live in a time and place where, we are so lucky. We have the choice to live a fulfilling life if we choose. It's not just about survival anymore.
So, as oddly as it sounds, the thought of death is life enhancing. It is a harsh reminder of how little time we really do have. The reality of everything we didn't do surfaces because the "I wished... and I should haves..." creep up. Do I wish I had stayed closer to my aunt, of course I do. But her life still had a huge impact on mine and I feel grateful. She has reminded me of how precious our time here is. She has reminded me to feel gratitude for today. I have another day to hug my little ones, and tell Jason I love him. Happiness to me is feeling gratitude for the things in my life. I have the opportunity to live a happy fulfilled life, and so do you. I've made it my legacy that when my time comes I know I will leave this world a better place than the one I came into. Until we meet again aunty.....
In loving memory
"The tragedy of life is not death..But what we let die inside of us while we live."
-Norman Cousins